Thursday, July 7, 2011

I miss my blog

You might not believe it, since I seem to have abandoned it so readily, but I miss my blog. I had lunch with the lovely Mir yesterday for the first time in about a year and she commented that I had retreated into my cave for a while and I suppose I did. My online presence has certainly diminished.

There was a period there where things were just kind of blah. I wasn't sad, but I wasn't really happy. I didn't really have anything that felt worthwhile to say to the larger world.

I also "quit" blogging for another reason. Now, this is going to sound extremely egotistical and self-centered, but hey, you're getting the real me here. I quit blogging because I quit getting comments. Oh, I'd get a few from my lovely, loyal readers (you know who you are!), but the traffic that I used to get was gone. And it hurt, I'm not gonna lie. My self worth as a writer was tied to the number of comments I received or how much traffic I got that day. I couldn't help but compare myself to those bloggers that I considered my equal whose traffic only seemed to be increasing. And I was jealous. And I didn't like feeling that way, so I just quit. That's the easiest way out, right? Instead of working to be like them, I just quit.

I was having lunch with a new writer friend a week or so ago and I was talking to her about how when I was younger I always wanted to be a writer and she interrupted me to say "You ARE a writer." And that stopped me cold. Am I? Maybe I am.

I'm not going to make any promises about posting here regularly. I hope I will. My intentions are good. But we all know what road is paved with good intentions, right? So. I'm back. Sort of. Maybe.


Burgh Baby said...

I swear to you, about 0.000000000000000000001% of the people who read my site actually comment. It's not *you* at all. I think blogging is evolving and is less social than it used to be. There are sites that still get tons of comments, but there's a different dynamic at work there. IMHO, anyway.

And you? Are a writer.

Mir said...

What she said. YES.

P.S. Yay! Welcome back!

Lauren said...

You are a writer!! And a darn good one too...

Glad you are back!

Robyn said...

I've missed you too! And, something must be going on because I've never gotten a lot of comments, but now I'm getting ZERO. So, I totally understand where you're coming from.

Marianne said...

I do think that commenting in general is dropping off. It's hard to not take it personally, though!

The Thrailkills said...

I think a lot of people are like me - I read whenever you post. But, I read it in a "reader" - I don't actually come over here to read your posts.

Thus, I rarely comment on blogs I read - but I read everything in my google reader every day :).

When I was reading a small handful of blogs, I commented all the time and read them on the actual websites. Now, I have dozens in my google reader and I don't anymore.

I can understand. When I blog, I blog for my own records - recording our journey or adventure. So, I really blog for me. I have to remind myself that I can't really care if others read it or comment on it, because I write for me. For my own enjoyment. For my own sanity at times!

Sherri said...

Glad you are back!